


Questions

by TMar



Category: due South
Genre: M/M, Romance, Series: The Couple Story, Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 1999-04-30
Updated: 1999-04-30
Packaged: 2018-11-10 12:16:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11126832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TMar/pseuds/TMar
Summary: After beginning an intimate relationship, Fraser and Ray must deal with questions about it from others.





	Questions

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Speranza, the archivist: this story was once archived at [Due South Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Due_South_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in June 2017. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Due South Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/duesoutharchive).

Questions

**m/m situation, contains sex (not too graphic though). This should probably be rated R just to be safe.**

So many people wrote with encouraging comments on my first story that I was inspired to write another one. Here it is. I'd appreciate comments on this one as well, as it is quite different from the other one (IMNSHO). 

Disclaimer: I didn't create these characters, they just possessed me for a while. I'm fine now and so are they. No permanent damage. Suing me wouldn't do you any good - have you *seen* what the rand/dollar exchange rate is?? 

# QUESTIONS

By T'Mar 

Ray Vecchio sat at his desk at the precinct. He was supposed to be doing some paperwork on a case that he and the Mountie had solved, but instead he was staring *past* the forms, pondering something that only one other person (well, two if you counted the wolf) knew about: his relationship with said Mountie. 

Ray couldn't remember ever loving anyone so much before in his life. But then, Benton Fraser was so easy to love. And the irony of it was that Fraser himself was totally oblivious to his charms. Being chased by women didn't frazzle him; he just didn't get it. And yet sometimes he'd ask a woman out to lunch, or for coffee, and there'd be just that hint... that hint that he knew they wouldn't say no. Maybe it just didn't occur to him that they would. Ray had tried to explain Fraser's charms to Fraser once, but the Mountie hadn't believed him. 

That had been the first time, Ray remembered. The first time they had made love. And what a shock that had been to the both of them. Ray had yelled that day; yelled at Fraser because Fraser had asked him yet another of those questions: questions which showed that he still had to get a handle on the way Americans spoke a lot of the time. Fraser had asked one of their witnesses some questions, and she'd answered them fully, all the while staring at Fraser in a way that would have made anybody else uncomfortable. But Benny, bless his heart, had not even noticed. 

After they'd finished the questioning, Fraser had remarked on how easy that had been. "Indications seemed to be that she would be an extremely difficult witness. Well! Guess we just got lucky." 

Ray had shaken his head. "That wasn't luck, Fraser." 

"I don't understand, Ray." 

"Oh, come on, Benny! You couldn't have missed how she was looking at you." 

"Well, yes, her gaze was a bit... intense. But that's been known to happen to witnesses during interrogation." 

Ray had tried to explain on the way back to Fraser's apartment, but Fraser had just given him that blank 'I'm clueless' look. When he had parked the car, Ray got out and followed his friend into the building. 

"Okay, Fraser. Come here." 

He had grabbed Fraser's arm and steered him bodily into the bathroom, positioning him in front of the mirror. "Now. What do you see?" 

"Myself, Ray." His tone indicated that he thought Ray needed a rest. 

"Yeah, yourself. Take a good look, Benny." 

"Ray, what are you trying to do?" 

"Fraser, *that* - " And here he indicated Fraser's mirror image. "That is what they like. You really don't get it, do you? These women take one look at you, and wham!" 

"'Wham'?" 

"Yeah, 'wham'! They want you, Benny boy." 

"To do what?" 

Ray just turned around in the small bathroom and banged his head against the wall. Fraser grabbed him, and pulled him away to stop him. "Ray, you'll hurt yourself." 

And then Ray stood looking into those clear blue eyes, and it all came to him in a rush. Suddenly, he knew exactly how those women felt. Suddenly, explaining this to Benny really did seem like a matter of life and death. He swallowed. "Let go of me, Fraser." 

Fraser let go. "Ray, why did you do that?" 

"It's less painful than trying to explain this to you." 

"Ray, how hard could it be? Use plain English." 

"Look who's talking," Ray said, but he nodded. "Look in the mirror, Benny." Fraser looked. Ray stood next to him. "Now, look. There's you, and there's me. If they ever have one of those auctions, you know, where they auction people off on a date, who do you think would get the highest bid?" 

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Ray." 

"You, Fraser. You really have no idea, do you?" He didn't wait for Benny to reply. "They see your face and experience your charms, and that's it. You could have been a model, Benny. Or an actor, that's how gorgeous you are." There. He'd said it. 

Fraser just looked more confused than ever. "What?" 

"You heard me, Benny." 

Fraser sounded like he was having trouble speaking. "You... you think I'm... 'gorgeous'?" 

"The entire female population of Chicago thinks you're gorgeous, Fraser. And probably the entire female population of the Yukon or wherever, too. Maybe the entire female population of Canada." For once, Ray had missed the tone in Fraser's voice. But Fraser wasn't going to give up. He wanted to know. 

"Ray... what about you?" It was said in a quiet, firm tone, and it threw Ray completely. 

"They all... what?" 

"You, Ray. Do you think so too?" 

Ray was convinced that he couldn't be hearing what he thought he was hearing. "Me? Well, of course I think so, Benny. Millions of women can't be wrong." 

"Oh." Did Fraser really sound... disappointed? Ray knew that if he let this moment go by, he'd never know the truth... the truth that had suddenly become apparent when Fraser had grabbed him to stop him from hurting himself. He looked into Benny's eyes. "I'd think so anyway, Benny." Just a few words... such a big chance. 

"Ray, I..." Ah, the Mountie not able to speak. This was good! "I'm glad. You should know that I think you are... 'gorgeous', too." 

Ray was suddenly unable to breathe. "Benny, this conversation is starting to sound... weird." He said it just in case Benny didn't mean that the way it sounded. 

"Ray, you know I sometimes start talking and don't stop again. I'm not doing that now. I mean every word. Really." 

Ray moved a little closer to Benny in the tiny bathroom. "But you haven't really said anything yet." 

Fraser smiled. For Ray it was as if someone had turned on a light. "What would you like me to say, Ray?" 

"The truth, Benny. Only the truth." 

But Fraser didn't say anything at all, he simply leaned forward and captured the stunned detective's mouth with his own, leaning into him, wrapping his arms around him, pushing him against the wall. 

The second this happened, Ray knew that *this* was what he'd been waiting for his whole life: someone to love. Not someone to take care of or show off at social functions, just someone to love. His arms went around Fraser, holding him as tightly as he could as he opened his mouth, embracing this kiss with all his might. He felt the heat of Fraser's tongue as it sought his own, and allowed himself to taste his friend as he'd always wanted to... Always wanted to, but never even realised it until now. But when he slid his tongue into the Mountie's mouth, Fraser suddenly broke the kiss and pushed him away, holding him at arm's length, breathing hard. 

Ray could hardly breathe either. "What?" He pleaded with Destiny and the universe not to take this away. Because he wanted Fraser so much he thought he'd die. Because he *loved* Fraser so much. 

Fraser swallowed: once, twice, three times. "Just... just checking." 

"What?" 

"That this is real." And then Benny grabbed him by the jacket and hauled him bodily forward, resuming the kiss with even more passion if that were possible. 

Finally Fraser's mouth left Ray's, but the kissing didn't stop. He began to kiss Ray's eyes, nose, forehead... everywhere that was not covered by clothing. "Oh, G-d... Benny, I love you." It came out as a strangled whisper, but there it was. He'd said it. 

Fraser stood back, then, just looking at him. "I know, Ray. I love you. I never thought I could love anyone like this, but I do. And I need you, Ray. Please... touch me." 

Some small part of Ray's mind wondered why they were still in the bathroom, but the rest of him didn't care. "Take this off, Benny," he said, meaning his red tunic. Fraser obeyed, his eyes still locked with Ray's. The tunic came first, then the shirt. And before Ray could think to take his own clothes off, Fraser's hands were suddenly there, undoing his tie, unbuttoning his shirt... 

"Ray?" 

"Huh?!" Ray was startled out of his memory by Elaine's voice. "Oh. Elaine. Yeah, what is it?" 

"Do you know you've been sitting there with that silly grin on your face for ten minutes?" 

"What silly grin, Elaine?" 

"Oh, don't give me that. You know the one. We all know it. And we've been taking bets, you know." 

"Bets?" All Ray seemed able to do was repeat what Elaine said. 

"Yeah, bets. On who it is. I took Lorraine. Huey thinks you're back with Angie..." Elaine stopped at the look of alarm on Ray's face. "Ray?" 

"Well, just keep betting, Elaine. You'll all lose." Ray knew better than to deny it; they were cops after all and could read the signs. Actually, worrying about things his co-workers had said to him was what had started off the pleasant flashback to begin with. All those questions. And he had no answers, not ones they could live with. So he just kept quiet. And now he fixed Elaine with a 'back off, okay' stare that could freeze at twenty paces. Elaine stepped away, but had to say one more thing. "Whoever it is must be someone special. You're really pulling out all the stops this time." 

Ray knew she meant he was doing everything he could to keep them from finding out. And he was. When Huey had first mentioned that he thought Ray was acting differently, Elaine had said, "Yeah, Ray must have a girlfriend!" 

Ray had been oh so casual about that. "No, no, Elaine. Wake up to the '90s. They're called Significant Others now." 

"Excuse me," Elaine had said, humouring him. "Significant Other. Well, Ray, *do* you have a Significant Other?" 

"Yeah," he had said, smiling. "But I'm not telling you who." 

And that had started the guessing, and betting, and Ray was sure he was spied on... But since he had spent most of his off-hours before the new development with Fraser anyway, nobody bothered to spy on him regarding the Mountie. And Ray had known they wouldn't. 

Just as he was thinking about this, the phone rang. "Vecchio." 

"Ray, I'm at the Consulate. I meant to leave earlier, but we had some pressing business involving..." 

Elaine looked up and saw the smile on Ray's face as he sat holding the phone. No way would she eavesdrop on the conversation, but she just sat and enjoyed the look that Raymond Vecchio had on his face. A man in love. It was a rare thing to see, these days - real love, that is. And whoever Ray was in love with, it was definitely real. For keeps. 

"Don't worry, I'll pick you up," Ray said, before Fraser could enlighten him in too much detail about whatever Consulate business he'd been on. It had only been - what, just over a week? - since they had first admitted their feelings, and both men were still a little in shock over it all. 

"Elaine, I'm leaving now," Ray called on his way out. 

"I know where you're going," Elaine said. 

That stopped him. "What?" 

"I saw that look, Detective." 

"What look?" 

"That was her on the phone, wasn't it?" 

Ray just shook his head and went out before Elaine could question him further. 

Fraser was waiting for him outside the Consulate. "How was your day, Ray?" 

Empty, without you, Ray wanted to say, but he didn't. That was obvious. "It was fine, Benny. I had a stack of paperwork to catch up on, so I stayed at the precinct all day. What fun - paperwork. Whoever invented paperwork should have been shot." He looked sideways at his friend. "And how was yours, Benny?" 

Empty, without you, Fraser wanted to say, but he didn't. That was obvious. "The inspector made me go through all the files involving immigration. It took most of the day. Fortunately, towards the end of the day, we had a little trouble in the office which broke the monotony." 

"A little trouble?" 

"All I can say is it involved Constable Turnbull and the bathroom sink." 

"Ah." That was all Ray needed to say - he'd met the offending Constable. "Benny - " 

At the same time Fraser spoke, "Ray - " 

They laughed at that. "You first," said Ray. 

"My day was empty without you," said Fraser. It had needed to be said. Maybe it *wasn't* obvious. 

"I was gonna say that, too," Ray replied. He wished he could stop the car and look directly at Benny, but there was traffic, so he couldn't. "Benny, my days mean nothing without you, nothing. I don't even know how much work I got done today. I sat there thinking about us most of the time." 

"Me too, Ray." 

Ray decided that Fraser had to know about the goings-on at the precinct. "Benny, the people back at the precinct? They know I'm involved with you. Well, not *you*, but they guessed. I didn't deny it." He knew that denying it would have been the safest course. "I couldn't. They'd've known I was lying. And it felt good to admit it to people, even if I couldn't tell them who it is. It felt good, Benny. I wish everybody could know." 

"You know that's not possible, Ray." 

"I know. I just want to tell *someone* before I go bust! I'm not ashamed of loving you, Benny, I'm not. I want to tell someone, anyone." 

Fraser smiled slightly. "You could tell people we meet on the street during cases." 

Ray grinned at that thought. He could just imagine it now: 'Hey, you see this guy in red? Well, I love him and we're having a torrid affair.' No, no, that wasn't right. 'We're having a wonderful relationship.' Yeah, that was better. The passersby would probably faint. "Nah," he said. 

"Maybe we could tell some people you know wouldn't be shocked." 

"Like who, Benny?" 

"Your mother?" 

Ray had actually contemplated telling his mother. He didn't *think* she would reject him, but he wasn't 100% sure. "I wanna tell her, Benny, I'm just not sure." 

"Your mother loves you, Ray." Fraser said it in a way that suggested the problem was settled. "Who else? Elaine?" 

"Yeah, I think Elaine could handle it." 

"The lieutenant?" 

Ray thought about this. Welsh was open-minded most of the time, and could be trusted with the information. He knew what Welsh would say, though: "Do whatever you like on your off-time, Vecchio. If you wanna be with Big Red, that's fine with me. But not in my precinct, okay?" Ray thought they could probably tell him. "Yeah, I think we could do that." 

As luck would have it, they arrived at Fraser's building. But when Ray turned off the car, Fraser looked him in the eye. "Not here, Ray." 

"What are you talking about, Benny?" 

"Your house. I have often dreamed of making love with you in your own bed." 

"You have?" 

"Yes. I always felt that was one part of you I could never have. As if that part of your life was closed off from me. But if you intend on telling your mother, then it doesn't have to be that way anymore." 

"You wanna go in my house, blurt this out to Ma and then go upstairs and - " The idea kind of shocked Ray. 

But Fraser shook his head. "No, Ray, of course not. We'll tell your mother, that's all. If she gives her approval, maybe I could stay over sometime. That's all I meant." 

"Oh. Okay." Ray started the car and pulled out into traffic again. "Yeah, that we could do." 

It wasn't so easy, however, when they faced Ray's mother in the kitchen. "Ma, we... uh..." Ray suddenly found that he couldn't get the words out. "We..." 

Ray's mother only looked at him with concern. "Ray? What is it?" 

Ray wanted to ask Benny to tell her, but he knew that if he let Benny start talking, Benny might get all philosophical and confuse his poor mother further. "Ma, this is going to be hard for you to hear, but you should know the truth." 

"I'm listening," she said, wondering what it was that had her son so... frazzled. "You can tell me anything, you know that." 

"I know, Ma. This is just difficult. Benny and I..." Pause. Why couldn't he just blurt it out? "We're in love, Ma." There. He'd said it. 

Ray's mother just stood there stirring the food, saying nothing. 

"Ma?" 

"I'm thinking, Raymondo. Just let me think, please." 

"Okay." 

So they stood there trying not to feel totally uncomfortable while Ray's mother cooked and thought. Finally she put the lid on the pot and turned around. "Does this mean you are a ho... hom... er..." Shame, she couldn't bring herself to say it. 

Ray shrugged. "I dunno, Ma. I just know I love Benny, and he loves me." 

Mrs Vecchio turned to Fraser. "Is this true, Benton? You love my son?" 

"Yes." That was all he needed to say, just yes. 

Ray's mother started turning a rather interesting shade of red; Ray knew there was an embarrassing question coming. But he also knew it probably had to be asked. He'd do whatever it took to make his mother understand. "Ray... you have... acted on these feelings?" 

"Yeah, Ma." 

"And you don't feel there is anything wrong with it?" 

"How can love be wrong, Ma?" 

His mother said nothing to that, she just looked from Fraser to Ray and back. Finally Ray couldn't take it anymore. "Ma, will you tell me what you're thinking about this, please. I don't wanna hurt you, but I had to tell you. It didn't feel right keeping this a secret." 

Mrs Vecchio finally looked at him. "Ray, I don't know if this is right or wrong. Many things that were once forbidden for us are now done. Look at you and Angie. We're not supposed to get divorced, but you did. And I think you're both happier for it. I don't want to contemplate what you do, that is the truth. But I can't condemn you for it, not if it makes you happy." 

"Thanks, Ma." Ray kissed his mother's cheek. 

"Just one favour, Raymondo." A pause. Ray wondered if he'd be asked not to bring Benny around anymore. To leave? But it wasn't. "Just... do not do anything in my house, please. Not when I am here." 

Ray looked at Fraser, who nodded. Fraser didn't look to happy about it, but he understood. "All right, Ma," said Ray. He nodded to Fraser and they turned to leave, but his mother spoke in a stern voice. "Stop. Where are you going?" 

"Back to Benny's place..." began Ray, but his mother shook her head. 

"Oh, no, you're not. It's time for supper." The way she said it made them realise she wanted them both there. 

"Me... and Benny?" 

"Raymondo... I didn't raise a child with a hearing problem." 

"No, Ma." 

So they stayed and had supper. Of course, Ray's sister figuratively drooled all over Fraser, but he was used to that by now. What he wasn't used to was Ray's mother sternly telling Frannie to lay off... not in those words, of course. Frannie looked confused, but she obeyed. 

After supper Ray's mother asked him to help with the dishes, so Fraser went out on the porch. He knew it would only be a matter of time before Francesca followed him, but he didn't care. Ray's sister was interesting. 

"So, Fraser, long time no see." 

Without letting her see, Fraser smiled to himself. It was true. "Yes, Francesca. A long time." 

"Got a girlfriend, huh?" 

That threw him. "What?" 

"You said something to my mother, right? That's why she got like that at the dinner table." 

"Something, yes." 

"So who is it?" 

"I can't tell you that." 

Frannie frowned. "Can't tell me? Why, is it like some kind of big secret?" 

"Yes, actually." 

"Why?" 

"It would be considered... inappropriate." Fraser consoled himself with 

the idea that 'inappropriate' could mean anything. 

Francesca frowned at him. "Someone you work with or something?" 

"Yes." 

"I get it. My lips are sealed." And she winked at him as though she shared in his 'big secret'. 

All Fraser could think of to say to that was, "Thank you kindly." 

Frannie had gone back into the house. Fraser just stood there in the night air, enjoying this peacefulness. And thinking. How he had wanted to make love to Ray in this house. He wasn't sure why, exactly. Perhaps if they made love here, it would add... validity?... to their relationship. But now that was not to be. Not tonight, at any rate. Not for a long time. He supposed it wasn't that important, but that didn't stop him from wishing. 

He remembered that first time, in his apartment, when Ray had tried to explain to him why women always did his bidding. He'd been shocked, and also... flattered, when Ray had told him he was gorgeous. He knew women thought so, but he didn't see it himself; couldn't see it. All he saw when he looked in the mirror was Benton Fraser, RCMP. And now Ray had said something more, and he had realised that Ray shared the feelings that he, Benton Fraser, had been keeping inside all this time. Feelings that he'd accepted he could never act on, because they weren't meant for that. But when Ray had begged for the truth, Fraser had known only one way to prove what he felt: he'd kissed him. 

And the truth had come out then, hadn't it? The truth that they loved each other. It had only been when he'd looked closely at Ray and then heard his own voice asking Ray to touch him, that he'd known it wasn't a dream, that it was really happening. 

"Take this off, Benny," Ray had said, indicating his uniform. And Fraser had taken the uniform off in record time, and turned his attention to Ray's clothes. Which had come off in record time as well. And Fraser could not think of a place where he had *not* been kissed, or a place where he had *not* kissed Ray. 

And then Ray had said, "Benny, I want you so bad." 

"Likewise, Ray. And you can have me." 

Ray looked into his eyes, seeing the truth - and love - there. And then they had finally noticed that they were standing in the bathroom. "You wanna go in the other room?" 

"That seems like a good idea." 

Leaving the clothes on the bathroom floor, they went into the main part of the apartment. Ray began to kiss him again, and all Fraser could think of was being touched by him, and made love to. He *wanted* it. "You can..." He swallowed. Saying it was going to be difficult. "Make love to me, Ray." He would have turned around, offered himself, but Ray stopped him, held him there, and kissed him until neither of them could breathe. Then he said, "No, Benny." 

"No?" 

"No. Not like that." 

"You said you wanted me. I assumed..." 

"No." Ray seemed adamant on this point. He sat down then, pulling Fraser down to sit next to him, and looked into those clear, blue eyes. "I'm a cop, Fraser. I've seen... well, a lot of things that shouldn't be seen. And I won't do that to you." 

"What are you talking about, Ray?" 

"I don't want to hurt you, Benny. Blood and pain isn't on my agenda, okay?" 

"You won't..." began Fraser, but Ray leaned over and kissed him. 

"Benny, trust me on this. Just trust me." He pushed Fraser down so that he lay across the bed, and leaned down to touch Fraser's erection with his lips. 

"Ray!" 

"Ssshhshhh, Benny." 

"You don't have to..." 

"I said shhhh," said Ray. "You're distracting me." 

"Sorry." And then Fraser could not say anything more as that mouth distracted *him*... And he knew that this was what he had always wanted: he wanted to be here like this, being loved by Ray - in whatever way Ray felt was appropriate. And oh so appropriate... he let himself experience every sensation until he could not take it anymore... 

"Benny?" 

Fraser's head jerked around to see Ray standing at the door. "Yes, Ray?" 

"You wanna go back to your place now?" 

"Have you finished discussing... things... with your mother?" 

"Yeah. She likes you, Benny. That won't change. But I think this thing with us has her kinda rattled. She'll get over it." 

"I hope so." 

They said their goodbyes and left. 

Back at Fraser's apartment, they were lying in the bed together, just sleeping. Normally Fraser wore his red pyjamas to bed, but ever since Ray had been sleeping in the same bed, he wore only boxer shorts... and most of the time not even those. Fraser woke when he felt fidgeting next to him. 

"Ray?" 

"Yeah, Benny?" 

"What are you doing?" 

"Nothing. I'm just... restless." Ray unwound his hands from where he'd been fiddling with the sheet, and then Fraser found out why Ray was restless. "You wanna tell Welsh tomorrow?" Ray asked. 

"Only if you want to, Ray. If you think that he'll take it well." 

"I think he will. He can be discreet." 

"Ray, don't damage your career on my account." 

"*Our* account, Benny. I love you. And I don't want to keep hiding it, okay? All those questions that I have to answer with lies... I don't like it. People need to know. Some people, at least." 

"All right." Now Fraser was wide awake. "Ray... do you remember the first time we... made love?" 

"Yeah, Benny, of course. It was the most wonderful thing that could have happened to us." 

Fraser leaned over and kissed Ray: first on the mouth, then the throat, feeling the warmth and interesting sensations under his mouth as Ray swallowed, hard. Then down further, kissing his chest, then... He looked up. "Are you sure, Ray?" 

"Wh... what?" 

"That you want this, this way? You never wanted to be..." It was difficult to say, but he had to. He had to know why Ray consistently refused all other methods. "...Inside me?" There was a strange yearning in his voice. 

Ray lifted his head from the pillow. "It isn't that, Benny." A pause. "Is that something you wanted, to make love to me... that way?" 

"I don't know, I just... I need to know why, that's all." Fraser still lay half across him, his chin on Ray's stomach. But as they stared into each other's eyes, Ray knew that he'd have to try to explain, or this would never be resolved. 

"Okay. Come here." Benny moved up against him, and they lay just holding each other. "Benny, most people don't know..." He stopped. Damn, but this was difficult! 

"Don't know what, Ray?" 

"The truth about... making love that way. Sunshine and roses, it ain't. I've seen, Benny. I've worked on... cases." He somehow couldn't bring himself to say more than that. 

But Fraser was astute. "Rape cases?" he asked quietly. "Ray, you must realise that this is not the same..." 

But Ray put his fingers over Fraser's lips. "No, not just... no. I've stood in hospital corridors and heard things I didn't wanna hear. I've heard testimony in courtrooms..." He trailed off, sighed. "It scared me, Benny. Even then, when it wasn't me involved. It scared me then, and it scares me even more now. So I'm not gonna do that to you, and you're not gonna do that to me. Okay? I love you too much for that." 

The last was said a bit aggressively, but Fraser at last understood. He'd have to find a medical person he knew and ask for details. He could see that he'd never get them out of Ray. "All right, Ray." He pulled the sheet and blanket up again. "Maybe we should get some more sleep." 

Ray snuggled against him, feeling safe and secure, making Fraser feel safe and secure. 

Lieutenant Welsh looked at the two men standing before him. What had they done now, he wondered. He had deduced that they must have done *something* because of the way they were both looking at the floor, the windows, the ceiling... anywhere but at him. 

"All right, Vecchio, let's hear it." 

"Sir?" Ray said, sounding a bit unsure of himself. 

This was bad, thought Welsh. Ray never used that tone of voice unless it was something serious. "I'm waiting," he said. "What did you or the Constable do now?" 

At last Ray understood why his superior was looking at them like that. "Ah. Well, no, Sir, we didn't *do* anything..." He looked at Fraser, as if expecting to be contradicted, but Fraser didn't even look at him. Clearly, he felt that since this was *Ray's* superior, Ray got to tell him. "Well, Sir, we thought you should know this in case one of us gets injured or something..." 

"Detective, you have five seconds to get to the point." Had Vecchio been taking speech lessons from the Mountie? He was starting to sound like him. 

"Yes, Sir." Ray looked ready to run from the room. Perhaps this hadn't been such a good idea after all. "Sir, Fraser and I, we..." 

"You did do something. Is this going to make the department look bad?" 

Fraser broke in. "Well, technically, we did do something, but since we're both adults, I don't think it has anything to do with the department... or the RCMP, for that matter. Although, some people might think it casts your police force in a bad light. Then again..." 

"All right, shut up." Welsh looked at Ray. "In ten words or less." 

"We're having an affair." Ouch. Even Fraser winced when Ray said that. Ray really hadn't meant for it to come out that way, not at all. But now it was done. 

Welsh, however, looked totally nonplussed. "Who?" 

"Us, Sir." 

"With who?" 

The pair just looked at each other, and Fraser inclined his head as if to tell Ray to go ahead. So he did. "Each other, Sir." 

The lieutenant blinked. "Each other." He said it as if trying to get a handle on the meaning. "Each other." He looked at them again, but Fraser was examining the floor, and Ray was looking out of the window. Welsh tried again. "You're having an affair... with... each other." Light dawned. "Oh." 

Then, in a deadpan tone, "I see." He looked from one to the other again. "And you're telling me this because...?" 

"We thought you should know, Sir. So if I'm ever wounded or anything... you know." 

Welsh did indeed know. This wasn't the first time he'd had this situation, but it was the first time it involved a Mountie. He nodded. "Yeah, I know. But I assume you don't want the rest of the precinct finding out?" 

"Well, no, Sir." 

"All right." Welsh blinked. "I have to say that nothing you've ever done has surprised me, Vecchio. I always expect you to make my life difficult. But I think this time, you've done it." 

Ray smiled. He couldn't help himself. "Thank you, Sir." 

"That wasn't a compliment, Detective." 

"Ah, no, Sir." 

They just stood there, until Fraser finally spoke up. "Lieutenant, I'm concerned that this could hurt Ray's career. No one will know, will they?" 

Welsh rubbed his hand over his face. "No, Constable. I let people keep their private lives private. As long as they stay that way. No holding hands in the precinct or anything." 

Fraser looked shocked; Ray knew Welsh didn't mean that *literally*. "Understood, Sir." 

"Good." He looked at Fraser. "Could you wait outside for a minute, Constable?" 

"Yes, Sir." Fraser went out, and Welsh turned to Ray. 

"This isn't a joke, I take it." 

"No, Sir." 

"I didn't think so. Vecchio, you realise if anybody else finds out, you're toast. I don't care what you do in your spare time. But I meant what I said - no funny business in the precinct." 

"Sir, with all due respect, I am a professional. So's Benny." 

"Yeah, some professional - he runs around followed by a *wolf*." 

"An eccentric professional, Sir." 

"Yeah. Okay. Dismissed." 

Ray left the office, feeling better. 

He found Fraser talking to Elaine quietly in the corner. When he came up to them, she turned a surprised gaze on him. "Is it true?" 

"Is what true, Elaine?" 

"What Fraser just told me." She lowered her voice. "About you two." 

"Yep, that's true." 

Elaine shook her head. "I would never have thought it. Not you two, never." 

Fraser only said, "Some things, Elaine... they're just meant to be. Not that I particularly believe in Destiny as such, but..." 

Elaine only nodded. "I know, Fraser. I know what that's like." She lifted her head, and the friends found a strange light in them. "I hope you'll be happy. That's all." 

"Thanks," Ray said quietly. 

"Yeah." She went over to her desk and gathered up an armful of files. "I've got work to do." Before leaving, she turned and looked at Ray. "You were right, I lost the bet. And I can't even tell them." 

"No, you can't." 

"I know." 

Both men could see she needed time to assimilate the concept of them together. "See ya later," Ray said as she went out of the office. He turned to Fraser. 

"How did you manage it? Telling her, I mean?" 

Fraser just shrugged slightly. "It was easy compared to telling your boss, actually. Elaine asked me what you were doing in his office, and I simply replied that you were telling him about our relationship." 

"That simple, huh?" 

"Well, yes, Ray." 

"And I went and made it sound tawdry with that 'affair' stuff." 

"I know you didn't mean to, Ray." 

"Yeah. Well, let's get outta here. Mission accomplished. Those we wanted to tell, we told." 

"But don't you have to work?" 

"Yeah. I got some witnesses to interview. You want me to drop you off at the Consulate?" 

"Yes, that'd be fine." 

Two weeks later, Ray called Fraser up with an unexpectedly happy note in his voice. "Benny, guess what?" 

"What, Ray?" 

"Ma has to go out of town for the weekend! My relatives over in the Big Apple are having a shower for - heck, I can't remember. Sophia or Daniella or one of my other cousins. No men allowed! Anyway, Frannie's going with her, so we'll have the house to ourselves." 

Fraser tried not to let the - was it hope? - show in his voice. "And I assume you're calling me for the reason we spoke about with your mother." 

"Yeah, Benny." A happy pause. "Look, I know you got work to do. Me too. But I wanted to call you as soon as I got the news. I'll let you get back to whatever you were doing." 

"Filing for Inspector Thatcher." 

"Like I really needed to know that, Benny. I'll pick you up later, okay?" 

"Yes, Ray." 

Benton Fraser stood in Ray Vecchio's bedroom and smiled. This was Ray's *home*; and being here with him like this would somehow bind him, Fraser, to Ray and his family. Fraser needed that; needed to know that Ray loved him enough to allow this. Oh, he knew that Ray loved him - he had shown him that he did so, so many times - but there had always been that little part of him that Fraser had never seen, that of the man on his own turf. And Fraser wanted to see it; he wanted to know *all* of Ray, not just *most*. And maybe, someday, they would rebuild the cabin, and then he could show Ray any part of him that might not be visible under the artificial lights of Chicago. Then nothing would be able to separate them again, Fraser knew. 

He turned to find Ray standing in the doorway of the room, just looking at him. "I'd ask why you're looking at me that way, Ray, but I have a suspicion that I know why." 

Ray smiled - that loving, cheerful grin that seldom saw the light of day. "I was just thinking how beautiful you are, Benny, standing there in my bedroom just being you." 

Fraser smiled. "Thank you kindly. I like your bedroom, Ray. It's... restful." 

"You think so?" 

"Yes." And before Ray could get another word out, Fraser went to the door and pulled him into the room, wrapping his arms around him as tightly as possible, just holding him there. "I love you, Ray." 

"I know, Benny. I love you, too." Ray could feel how much his friend wanted him - and he knew that he wanted Benny. Just the sight of him standing there had been enough. He wanted to say more, or do more, but Fraser took him by surprise, undoing his belt buckle and pants faster that he would have thought possible. And then his pants and underwear were unceremoniously yanked down as Fraser knelt in front of him. This was surprising behaviour from Fraser indeed - but this wasn't how Ray had thought things would go. "Benny -- " 

"Ssshhhsshhh," Fraser said, quoting him, "you're distracting me." 

So Ray shut up as Benny's mouth did things to him that he'd only fantasized about. Benny had obviously been reading up on... certain things, thought Ray, as he closed his eyes and concentrated on staying standing. Why had Benny picked the middle of the room for this? Ray opened his mouth to ask that question, but all that came out was a strangled gasp... And then he went rushing into the peak of pleasure, finally falling to the floor when it was over. 

Fraser's arms were around him as they sat there tangled together on the floor. "How was that, Ray?" Fraser asked, that innocent - innocent! \- smile back on his face. 

"G-d, Benny, that was..." Ray couldn't even think of a way to describe what he'd felt, so he just kissed him instead, tasting himself in his friend's mouth. He came up for air after a minute, trying again. "That was..." 

"Good?" queried Benny, those blue eyes shining with lovelight and pleasure at Ray finally being at a loss for words. 

"Oh, yeah, 'good' is totally inadequate. Just lemme ask you one thing, Benny. Why in the middle of the room? I thought you wanted to make love to me *in* the bed?" 

"I do, Ray. But... it had to be done, sealed, whatever you'd like to call it. That moment, right here. Our love had to be proclaimed that way." 

"Is that some Canadian thing?" 

"Not that I'm aware of." 

"Ah." A short pause, then, "Benny, where the hell did you learn that? You've been holding out on me!" 

"Well, Ray, you'll remember that you told me there were certain things you didn't want to do, for... medical... reasons? I looked those things up, I... asked advice." 

Ray could hardly believe his ears. "You? Asked advice? From who?" 

"Whom, Ray." 

"Whatever." Ray just stared. "I can't believe this. You discussed our sex life with a stranger? You, Benton Fraser, Royal Canadian Mounted Police, discussed your sex life with a stranger. And mine, too!" 

"A medical professional, Ray. All strictly confidential. I made sure." 

"Okay, so who was it?" 

"That isn't important. She - " 

"Ah, geez!" From Ray's point of view this was getting worse all the time. 

"She commended me on having the... er, courage, to ask. She gave me some very interesting literature. In fact, I have it here. Would you like to have a look?" 

"Not right now, thanks. Benny, let me get this straight. There's a woman out there in Chicago who knows what we do and don't do in bed. Am I way off base here?" 

"She knows what I *asked* her, Ray. No one's name was mentioned." 

"Oh, yeah, I'm sure. Like they could miss that red uniform." 

"I'd never go there wearing my uniform, Ray. I needed to understand your concerns, that's all. I found her most helpful." 

As Fraser said that, Ray realised that it must have been terminally embarrassing for Benny, and that he really had done it only to understand Ray's refusal to do certain things. "And she doesn't know who we are?" 

"Of course not." 

"Okay." Ray got off the floor and held out his hand. "Come on, Benny." 

Fraser took the hand and sat down on the bed next to Ray, who looked at him with love, concern, and... apology... on his features. 

"Sorry I got upset, Benny. I just... to tell Ma or Welsh is one thing. To have people *know* what we are or aren't doing... that's too weird." He leaned over and kissed Fraser. "But I can live with it, if you'll do what you just did again sometime." His eyes sparkled in blatant invitation. 

"Anytime, Ray, you know that." 

Ray stood up, then, and pulled the covers off his bed. "Right. Lie down." 

"Ray, what...?" 

"Well, let's see if I can learn from you, huh, Benny?" 

Light dawned. "Oh." Fraser was still wearing his shirt and jeans, however. "Ray, what about...?" He indicated that he was still dressed. 

"Half the fun is undressing you, Benny." 

Fraser smiled. "Oh, really." 

"Yeah, really." 

Much, much later, Fraser lay wrapped in his friend's arms, the covers pulled securely over both of them. Ray was fast asleep - Ben could tell by his breathing - and so he had a chance to think. 

Finally, they had made love in Ray's house; in Ray's bedroom; in Ray's bed. He couldn't believe how badly he had *needed* that... and now it was done. All that was left was for them to go up north, to the cabin... Fraser smiled at the thought. But that could wait. Right now they were doing just fine where they were... Fraser's line of thought was interrupted when he realised that Ray's breathing had changed... and eyes were watching him. He turned his head so their lips met. "Good... morning, Ray." 

Ray squinted at the window. "It's dark outside." 

"I know. But it is after midnight, so technically it's now morning." 

"Oh. Well, good morning, Benny." 

Fraser was surprised that Ray didn't argue with him over whether it was morning or not, but he simply ran his hand over his friend's cheek and said nothing. 

Ray did have some things to say, however. "I'm glad we did, this, Benny. It feels right, having you here." 

"It does feel right. And someday, Ray, we will go to the cabin and..." 

"Rebuild it?" Ray had a smile in his voice. 

"Yes... among other things." 

Ray only snuggled further down under the covers, tightening his hold on Fraser. "I'm sure. But let's get some sleep now, okay? I have a feeling we'll need it." 

"So do I, Ray." A pause. "Ray...?" 

"Yeah?" 

"Thank you for... this." 

"You're welcome, Benny. I love you." 

"I love you, Ray." 

THE END 


End file.
